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Archive for March, 2007

World Horror Convention

March 31st, 2007

Look, Mom, I’m at the World Horror Convention!

Wow, exciting.

Except take away the exciting.

Kind of disappointed. Where are the costumes, where are the blood packs, where are the Breast Rippers, the Mutilation Shears, or the Cats Claws (no, I’m not making those up). Where are the special edition HellRaiser posters? You call this a convention?

Turns out this is the literary World Horror Convention…which pretty much means that this is for the print professionals — agents, editors, etc. f So far, just feeling my way around…seeing if there’s anyone I can go bug (and I don’t mean the nice ladies at the Brass Rail…or if I run out of money, the Zanzibar).

Writing

Well played, incorrect-test-results

March 30th, 2007

Friday afternoon…like any other afternoon, except the Doctor told Kari that she had leukemia.� Seriously, Leukemia.� “But I thought I just needed an iron shot?” she replied.

“No, the doctor replied.� You need a bone biopsy.”

Read more…

News

Paint-A-Thon 2007

March 25th, 2007

Yes, the annual Paint-A-Thon at the McFadden household. A special thanks to all those who helped out (though it was so much fun, I should be charging them).

John and Danielle made this their second annual Paint-Til-You Drop event, but this was baby Emelia’s first year in attendance. She was a great help…falling asleep in the middle of a hectic household.

Originally, I didn’t want Leslie to come…because she doesn’t own her own house…and I don’t like ‘renters’ but since she bought her house yesterday, I decided to let her help her come. It also helps her case that Addy is Paige’s best friend.

Kari’s friend Carrie (yes, I know) has made this her THIRD Paint-A-Thon. At one point, she was the only one painting. Good for her!

Also good news is that Paige and Cordy found their new day care lady. Her link is here . I think she’s perfect for the job.

Brian fit the job perfectly, spare rags and all. Though oddly, not a drop of paint on him at the end. Hmmm.

Special thanks to everyone…and we’ll see you next year.

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Don Frye is my hero

March 22nd, 2007

Don Frye exploded onto the UFC scene way back at event number 8. With legendary battles with Mark Coleman and Ken Shamrock, Don is a man’s man (and happens to look like a roided up Tom Selleck). Don Frye is also a great giver of advice…as found below.

Since I’m only a half man now (see previous posts), I thought I share with you some real ‘manly’ wisdom…from Don Frye.

Dear Don

I’ve been really good friends with this woman for a little over a year. A few months ago I figured out that I really liked her, more than just wanting to get into her pants. How can I tell her how I feel and get my point across without looking and sounding like just another jackass?

So you like her but aren’t man enough to tell her? I hate to break it to you, partner, but you already sound like a jackass.

That’s not so bad though. That means the pressure’s off. You’re a jackass. I thought it was just an insult until now, but you’re the real thing.

Now that you know, you don’t have to worry about it. Just go ahead and be a jackass. Ask her out. Go shopping with her at Bed, Bath and Beyond. Then take her to Frederick’s of Hollywood, make sure she gets the point. Whatever.

Sure, she’ll probably think you’re a jackass. I do. But maybe she likes that. You never know. There are tons of jackasses out there, and somehow lots of them have pretty hot women on their arms. It’s a mystery, but there it is.

So I say go for it. Stop tip-toeing around and just dive right in. That’s what I’d do. Then again, I’m not a jackass.

Dear Don,

My roommate recently discovered his girlfriend of 9 months was making out with some random dude in a club last week. Unbeknownst to her, the guy she cheated on him with goes to college with my roommate (which is how he found out). It’s been 2 days and he has not dumped her. He’s gone on to tell me this was his fault because he had not been giving her any space.

This girl has also cheated on her past 2 boyfriends. I think if he doesn’t turf this chick soon, he is going to look like the biggest chump in the world. What would you do in my roommate’s situation? How do you recommend I go about smacking some sense into this kid?

That sounds like a bad situation. What I’d recommend is this: forget this loser and go be friends with the guy she was making out with. Maybe that guy has some pride and dignity, because your roommate sure doesn’t.

What kind of man acts that way? He should be ashamed. I’m ashamed for him.

But it’s not your job to try and fix his whole life. With things like this, you can’t make a person do what they ought to. Either they see it for themselves or they don’t.

Your roommate doesn’t. He’d rather tell himself stories and pretend everything’s okay.

Well, it’s not okay. And odds are it isn’t going to get any better any time soon. I say get out of there. Do it now.

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I’m Shooting Blanks

March 22nd, 2007

I think the pictures says it all.

In a nicer note, received this from Kari today via email while I was at work: Since Dr. Snip announced it officially today that you are no longer a man, but rather a Manny ( you know a man-nanny), you can now do some female related chores like grocery shopping.

Here is your first official list. Be strong I trust you can do this, half-man.

Nice.

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